A Lifestyle & Parenting Blog

Big This Week

Recent Posts

Wednesday, 19 October 2016

Get To Know Your Child Better Through Their Dreams

We all know how important sleep is for our children's health but have you ever thought that getting them to share their dreams will give you an insight into their hopes and fears and the person they are becoming?


These days I don't always remember my dreams but I can still remember the scary dreams I had as a child about monsters under the bed and goblins in the wardrobe!

Adjustamatic, who make adjustable beds have teamed up with sleep expert Ian Wallace to explain how understanding our children's dreams gives us an amazing opportunity to get to know our little people better in the rather touching video below.

 

Apparently, it is quite normal to dream about goblins, elves and fairies around the ages 5-7 because it is at that age that we begin to understand power hierarchies and to learn about rules.  Not surprising when you think that this is the age when kids move towards a more formal education - a little less play and a lot more expectations from them.

It is also in our dreams as well that we process those things that are upsetting and that are big concepts for us to understand, such as death. The 'bad' things that happen to your child may well make an appearance in bad dreams.

Both Caitlin and Ieuan have had periods of bad dreams where they have shouted in the night and needed comfort and when asked in the morning, it is always pretty obvious to us what the cause of the bad dream has been.

Ian Wallace describes dreams as the 'ultimate selfie' because we are able to explore different aspects of our personality, try on new characters and be honest with ourselves about how we really feel.  And it's the same for our children.

So how can we encourage our children to talk about their dreams in a positive way?  And, if they are having difficulty sleeping, how can we help them?

Here are some useful tips.

*Make sure that their bedrooms are conducive to good sleep.  Some children hate a room that is too dark and appreciate a nightlight or a torch by their bedside.  Consider blackout blinds or curtain linings if too much light is keeping them awake - for example from an outside light, or early morning sunlight.

*Is their mattress comfortable?  As a child grows and gets heavier, they will need a mattress with additional support.  All mattresses should be replaced once they are around 8 years old.

*Do they have a good bedtime routine?  Children around 7 still need 9-11 hours so a wake-up time of 7 am for school means a bedtime of around 7:30 - 8 pm.

*Do they have sufficient 'wind-down' time? The advice is to switch off iPads and tablets at least an hour before going to bed. Reading a bedtime story is a much better substitute for extra game time as it is calming and bonding for both of you - and a great opportunity for your child to talk about anything that is bothering them before they drop off to sleep.

*Make time to talk about your child's dreams with them.  You could share something you dreamed about and encourage them to return the favour.  You could get them to draw some of the creatures that have appeared in their dream.

*If they have woken in the night with a nightmare, gently ask them what it was about (be aware that they often don't remember) and see if they can tell you what they think caused it.  You may have your own ideas of course but children often see things very differently than we do.

*Some children need a comforter, special teddy or blanket for security and it is normal to need these for longer than you might think.  We bought Caitlin and Ieuan dream-catchers which hang on their windows.

*It may also help if you share some of your bad dreams (in a light-hearted way, so as not to distress your child further) and to explain that some dreams are universal - for example falling or losing your teeth!

The famous psychologist Sigmund Freud recognised the importance of studying our dreams to understand our subconscious mind and wrote a classic book on the subject: "The Interpretation of Dreams" - and many of his theories are still accepted today.

It is through our, and our children's dreams that we get the chance to acknowledge what is happening in our lives and to truly acknowledge how we feel about it.



Why not ask your kids to share their dreams with you - you might be surprised and enlightened at what you learn.

And with this knowledge, you'll have an extra string to your parenting bow when it comes to building a strong, supportive relationship with your children on their road to adulthood.
Share:

Beck Valley Book Tour: The Fabulous @50 Re-experience


Baby Boomer women have spent decades suppressing their own wants and desires, and losing themselves in the expectations and demands of culture, parents, partners, and children, working hard to please and care for almost everyone but themselves. They've been misunderstood by marketers, politicians, millenials, most men .. and last but not least, themselves.

The time has come for these strong, beautiful, and fabulous women to discover, reveal, and honor their true selves. The time has come for them to re-expereince life as they've known it, and to celebrate life as it can be.


If you're a Boomer woman in personal crisis needing to reinvent your life, facing divorce, life-threatening illness, financial disaster, or the crushing loneliness after the kids have grown and gone, if you are asking yourself, "Now what?" and fearing that it might be too late for you and your dreams ... this book is for you.

The Fabulous@50 Re-Experience

From Dianna Bowes, visionary foundress of Fabulous @ 50, The Fabulous @50 Re-Experience is a living, breathing, sweet and sassy guide to remind you that you're not alone ... and it's not too late for you to thrive.
Available to buy from....

Read a preview HERE

Untitled22

Untitled22  
Artwork from the book


My Review

I qualify as a Boomer woman (just) having in 1964 but this book and the experiences of the women within its pages spoke loudly to me.

Dianna suggests that our fifties should be a time of reinvention and rediscovery of who we are, rather than a slow sinking into old age and an acceptance that nothing will ever change.

Through a series of exercise, gentle coaching and personal artwork, she explains that it is never too late to change if we will only do the work that is needed to face our demons.

Dianna's focus is on positive psychology - that is to say moving forward by taking our experiences as a chance to learn and reshape ourselves rather than the more typical talk therapy where bad past experiences are dredged up and in so doing we relive them in all their horror when we might actually have succeeded in putting them firmly to bed.

The book teaches us to re-experience these events in our lives in a way which builds us up rather than reduces us even further.  Many women of my generation were brought up to be dutiful wives and daughters, to be seen rather than heard and to know our 'place'.

Peppered within the book's pages are numerous personal stories from women born in the Boomer years and many of these left me feeling either sad or angry. These are women who put everyone else first and squashed their own hopes and dreams at enormous personal cost.

What stays with you is the acceptance of their lot when, had they only had some noble friends (Dianna's term for a true friend who will not shirk from telling you the truth, both good and bad), things might have been very difficult.

Dianna suggests we should be our own 'noble friend' first and offers the hand of friendship and a place in her growing Fabulous @50 community. 

Make no mistake, however, to secure your own Fabulous @50 Re-experience, you will have to work hard and hold your past life up to the light in order to reshape it, and yourself for your remaining years.

But surely living in the light has to be better than senior years spent in darkness and, if you're brave enough, this book will show you the way.

About the Author



Dianna is a shining example of how to get the most out of life as a “seasoned” woman. At a time when most of us look to relax in front of the TV, she is out in our Alberta communities creating a dynasty! And in her “spare time,” she turns her time and talents to family and friends, graphic design, painting, biking, cross-country skiing and fulfilling a host of volunteer commitments. Though Dianna is now a successful entrepreneur and inspiration to many, she had to overcome many barriers to get there.

Raised by grandparents in a dysfunctional family, Dianna was shy and lacking in self-confidence as a child and young adult. She married at 20, but tragically her new husband was killed in a explosion within a year. She remarried a few years later and was blessed with two children who are the light of her life. But the marriage was rocky and further eroded Dianna’s self-esteem.

A serious health problem (tumour on her vertebrae) in her 40s brought things to a head and the marriage ended. Rather than wallow in despair, Bowes decided to take control of her life. She recreated herself into the woman she always wanted to be by focusing on personal development and coaching.

When her 50th birthday was approaching, she started Fabulous@50 (a community for seasoned woman) and has never looked back. Now confident and poised, Bowes is dedicated to helping other women through their life changes and challenges.

Bowes has won numerous awards for her work: a 2014 Leader of Tomorrow Award from Business in Edmonton, 2011 YWCA Woman of Distinction Award (Turning Point category) The 2014 New York Stevie Awards in two categories: Women Helping Women (Bronze) and Best Event (Gold). 2015 New York Stevie Award - Top Canadian Entrepreneur (Bronze).


Find the author on the following sites...

Keep in the loop, become a Fabulous@50 community member and receive our Be Fabulous! E-Magazine Click here {no catch} just a fun e-mag with fun stuff!


Adaption is a part of life, and we can accept it or fight it. It's a choice!


Fabulous@50 Experience 2014 - Edmonton 



Follow the Book Tour

Photobucket

I received this book through Beck Valley Books Book Tours, I have volunteered to share my review and all the opinions are 100% my own.

NOW FOR THE AUTHOR'S GIVEAWAY
Signed Book Giveaway - 4 Winners!!
Open Worldwide
Ending on Sunday 30th October at 11.59pm EST


Enter Below and Good Luck !!
a Rafflecopter giveaway


Share:

Tuesday, 18 October 2016

Win A Copy Of Peter Rabbit's New DVD Collection [closed]

Who doesn't love cheeky Peter Rabbit, possibly Beatrix Potter's most famous creation?  Peter's back with more 'tails' of fun, mischief and friendship in a new DVD collection "Peter Rabbit – The Tale Of The Great Rabbit And Squirrel Adventure" which is released by Abbey Media and on sale from Monday 24th October 2016.



Join our hero, Peter Rabbit, in this fifth installment of his animated adventures. Peter tells a curious Cotton-tail how he and Squirrel Nutkin became friends and how Nutkin’s lost his tail. Soon Peter is on an adventure to retrieve Nutkin’s tail, even though it means going to Owl Island! This charming DVD collection features over seventy minutes full of fun, mischief and adventure, in 6 action packed adventures. Let’s hop to it!

With a taste for radishes and a thirst for adventure Peter Rabbit is the lovable and extraordinary friend you longed to hang out with when you were a kid. But when the chips are down and danger lurks, there’s no better friend to have around than Peter and his boundless courage will always see him through.

Peter Rabbit – The Tale of the Great Rabbit and Squirrel Adventure features the following episodes: - The Tale of The Rabbit and Squirrel Great Adventure; The Tale of Old Brown’s Feather; The Tale of The Wiggly Worms; The Tale of Two Enemies; The Tale of Fierce Bad Rabbit; The Tale of Mr Tod’s Trap

I have one copy to give away.  Entry is via the Rafflecopter widget.  UK entries only and terms and conditions apply (please see my Competitions Page).  The giveaway will end at 11:59 pm on Friday 11th November.

You can find this DVD at all major retailers and it would make a great Christmas stocking filler.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Good luck!
Share:

Monday, 17 October 2016

Top Tips For Avoiding Colds & Flu From Dr Dawn Harper & Coldzyme

It's that time of year again where I find myself on red alert for the signs of an impending cold in the Hobbis household.  This involves much brandishing of  tissues and shouting "wash your hands with hot water". The medication cupboard (yes we have a whole cupboard) is restocked with Vicks Vapour Rub and I threaten everybody with my chicken soup (with a bit of help from Heinz obviously).

So if, like me, you want to make sure that the dreaded colds and flu don't visit this winter, leading media medic, Dr Dawn Harper, in conjunction with ColdZyme which fights the cause of the common cold, have compiled a few tips that are definitely good for our health.

Dr Harper’s Top Tips

• Wash your hands regularly – contrary to popular belief, most coughs and colds are spread by hand contact not by coughs and sneezes, so simply keeping your hands clean will go a long way to protecting yourself.

• Wash down surfaces and door handles – the viruses that cause colds can survive for several hours outside the human body.

Dr Dawn Harper
• Eat a well-balanced diet rich in fruit and vegetables to keep your immune system in good shape. Vitamin C and zinc are vital for a healthy immune system. Zinc is found in red meat, beans and fortified cereals, whilst foods rich in vitamin C include fruits such as oranges and strawberries and vegetables such as peppers, kale and broccoli.

• Make sure you get into a good sleep routine. When we sleep our immune system repairs itself, so chronic sleep deprivation can make you prone to infections.

• Manage your stress levels. Try to prioritise and delegate where possible as stress can play havoc with your immune system.

• Consider using anti-viral tissues and keep them in your bag or on your desk if those around you have a cold to minimise the spread of the virus and make sure that tissues are put straight in the bin.

• Use ColdZyme, a revolutionary mouth spray which targets the cause of the common cold and is clinically documented to help reduce the duration of a cold.

We tried Coldzyme last year and you can read our review here.

I also asked some of my lovely blogger friends for their top tips for preventing or dealing with a cold and this is what they said.

"If a cold strikes I make sure to keep warm, use medication at regular intervals and take night nurse to help me get a refreshing nights sleep when I need it most." - Katy Stevens, Katykicker.com

"As soon as I feel a niggle I start drinking a vitamin drink like Berrocca and cancel my plans to get some much needed R n R!" - Samantha Wragg, Cocobutterblog

"Pure orange juice in this house! That and Vicks on the feet with socks to bed to sweat the cold out!" - Amy Green, The Smallest Of Things.

"A hot cup of honey, lemon and fresh ginger a day throughout the colder months really helps keep colds at bay for me. If you have the time, steeping lemon chunks and fresh ginger in a pot of honey for a few weeks makes an effective concoction!" - Sophia Ford, Tattooed Tealady

"Wash your hands! All the time. Touching things and then touching your face, eyes, nose, mouth, is the fastest way to get a cold. Wash wash wash. And carry hand sanitiser." - Naomi Perilli, Tattooed Mummy

"I'll have honey and lemon with an actual tea bag (no milk!)! It gives you a bit of energy as the tea has a slow caffeine release to help you power through when you have things to do! Also hot steamy showers or if I'm feeling up to it, a microwavable curry. The steam or spice clears your nose and helps you blow it if its especially stuffed! Also avoid dairy as much as possible, it sticks in your pipes and increases phlegm!" - Abigail Glover, Mermaid Mischief

"Hot toddies - I've had them for colds since being a child. Hot water, honey, sugar, slice of lemon then a couple of shots of whiskey (obviously I didn't have that as a child). Drink it as hot as you can." -Chermaine Susan Samphire, Chammy In Real Life - the real life ramblings of me.

What's your top tip for avoiding colds and flu?
Share:

Sunday, 16 October 2016

Toy Review: Timeline:British History - Educational, Historical Fun For Kids by Esdevium Games

We've reviewed quite a few games now and whilst most of them are entertaining and pass the odd hour as a family, we've not found one that challenges the brain cells of kids and adults alike.


Timeline: British History is different.  It's a card game where you have to assess whether one historical event occurred before another and put the cards in the correct chronological order.

The game comes in a brightly coloured tin which is really attractive.  I particularly liked that the packaging is marked with symbols showing how many players, the suggested age range of players and the length of time it takes to play (in this case 15 minutes which is ideal for an 8 year old).

The box contains printed instructions and two piles of cards which are shuffled together to make one pack.

Each player is dealt four cards and therefore has four chances to place the events on their cards in the correct order.

Get it right and you have one less card to get  rid of - and you're closer to winning. A wrong decision means you return your card to the pile and take a brand new one.




The game commences with each player laying their four cards face up without looking at the date on the back.  The first event is taken off the central pile of remaining cards and each player takes turns to put their card either before or after the events on the table.  Cards are then slotted into place as the timeline builds.

The winner is the player who correctly places all four of their cards first.

It's suitable for 8+ children and I guarantee that it will challenge parents and grandparents too.  This gives the game a much more level playing field and the children are less likely to have a major strop because they consider the adults have an unfair advantage.

Let me give you an example.  Which came later? The Peasants' Revolt or Geoffrey Chaucer's beginning of "The Canterbury Tales"?  Answer, the latter in 1387.  The Peasants' Revolt was in 1381.

How about these.  Which came later - Isaac Newton's Law of Universal Gravitation or the founding of The Bank of England?  Again, the latter.  The Bank of England was founded in 1694 and Newton's law was discovered in 1687.



You can see that these are very challenging for a child as young as 8 but still really interesting and all the more entertaining to find out your mother is pretty useless at guessing!

Timeline:British History retails at around £13.99 which, for a game of this quality, is very good value.  My only criticism would be that the playing cards are quite small but on the plus side, the game in its sturdy tin would be great to take on holiday.

I also think it's the kind of game which will get more interesting the more you play it as you will begin to remember some of the dates of the events and get better at placing - and getting rid of - your four cards quickly.

I played Timeline:British History with Caitlin (8) and her cousin Emily (21) and Caitlin was surprisingly good at it!  It's a great opportunity to talk about historical events and to explain who some of the famous people are.  In other words, you could easily use this game as a teaching tool.

We really enjoyed this one and if you're looking for a game which is slightly more challenging but fun at the same time, I'd recommend Timeline: British History.

*We tested this game in our role at Approved Toy Testers for The Rainbow Toy Awards 2016




Share:

Friday, 14 October 2016

My Problem Page - What Was I Asked In Week 41?

This week I'm talking about disappearing first dates, despairing about never finding love, coping with Tinnitus and what to do when you discover your ex has lied to you - after you broke up.

If you would like any advice, feel free to message me or pop a comment in the comment box at the end of this post. I promise to be gentle.


Here's just some of the questions I've been asked this week.

Q: How much time will my tinnitus take to go away ? 


I watched a movie a few days ago while wearing headphones. I usually keep the volume low but on that day I increased it to 200% by mistake. I decreased it immediately and continued watching at low volume for about half an hour but after that my ears started ringing because of tinnitus.


A: You’ve given yourself what we fellow sufferers refer to as a ‘spike’ - a period of time where the volume of our tinnitus increases due to some action or circumstance often out of our control - for example a car horn, a slammed door, or in my case this week a loud shout at the kids. 

The thing to remember is that the spike will go down and that stress makes it worse. 

The best way to deal with tinnitus is to focus on something else - as difficult as that may be. Some have likened it to the brain’s fire alarm - it’s warning you that there’s been an ‘incident’. 

Try not to panic. The ringing will probably subside in time but it’s worth seeing a doctor to get your ears checked out - particularly if this is the first time you have had tinnitus. 

Personally I avoid headphones like the plague as I think concentrated sound being piped into your ears cannot help a tinnitus sufferer, nor your hearing in general - but that’s just me. 

No movie is worth jeopardising your hearing for.


Q: Is it normal to get headaches when wearing new glasses?


A: It can take up to 2 weeks for your eyes to get used to a new prescription but I would say a headache is a clear sign that the prescription is wrong. 

It sounds like your glasses are too strong, or not strong enough. 

Is this the first time for you wearing glasses? 

If it isn’t but it has been ages since you updated the prescription then it’s possible you may experience a little discomfort too. 

But don’t put up with headaches. Go back to your optician and tell him about your problem. There should be no charge to correct a prescription if it is the optician’s error. 

And let’s face it, glasses are too expensive to waste money on a pair that we can’t wear!


Q: I'm a 16 year old boy and I've never been in a relationship before. Nor do I want to be in a relationship at the moment. Is that bad? 


A: No of course not.

It’s very easy to look around and believe that everyone is in a relationship or dating but I bet they’re not you know. And I bet loads of your friends feel the same way.

Being in a relationship will happen when the time is right and when you meet someone who interests you. Your teenage years are your time to learn, grow, develop a few passions, enjoy yourself. You can worry about relationships later.

Just remember, that it’s very easy to fib on Facebook and Snapchat. You can write anything you like in a status update but it doesn’t mean it’s true.

If you’re secretly saying you don’t want to be in a relationship because you don’t think anyone’s interested, then I’d say I bet they are.

And even more reason to use this time to focus on yourself so you’ll be even more of a catch when the time is right.


Q: No one attracted to me ever. Its too hard to believe even for me. What is the most effective way to get success?


A: Throw your checklist away. Seriously. 

Finding a girlfriend is not a scientific experiment. Concentrate less on you and more on them. 

Find a girl who interests you and go and talk to her. Ask her questions about herself. It’s being interested in others than makes them interested in us. It’s got nothing to do with your education, or your brain power or even your looks. 

Take a break from girlfriend hunting and go find some new hobby that interests you. Spend time with others and get to know them. 

The best way to find a girlfriend is to make more friends. Learn how to listen. Desperation is offputting. Nobody will be attracted to you if you don’t give them the chance and put yourself down at every opportunity. 

Look at the people around you. Are they all gorgeous? No. Are they all brilliant? No. Are they all highly educated? No. 

But they are interested in others and have learned that being a good kind person and a great listener gets you a long long way in this life - especially when it comes to love. 

Q: I had a first date with a guy my friend had one date with. She said it was amazing but he sent one text after wards and then disappeared. He did the same to me. Is this a bad sign? Do you think he's a player, or did he just not like my friend?  Why did he disappear after one text for both of us after we both had an amazing time?


A: How did you both meet this guy? It wasn’t an online dating site or Tinder by any chance, was it?

It’s very easy to get hooked on the thrill of the chase which I suspect is what happened here. There are so many potential dates to choose from, lots of those looking for love are spoiled for choice and can see no reason to limit themselves to just one or two. 

These are the people though, who aren’t looking for commitment or have such high standards that they are looking for Mr or Miss Perfect - and nobody ever measures up. 

I wouldn’t read too much into this. I’m not sure this guy is even a player. He may not have had any bad intent to treat you both badly. He probably didn’t consider himself interested enough to be on the brink of starting a new relationship so therefore didn’t need to excuse himself or explain. 

He might have sent you both a text just to keep you on the hook, or perhaps he felt badly because he knew he was about to let you both down. 

Wait for the guy who enjoyed his time with you so much that he actually calls you. I often think texting isn’t real life. 

If this guy really had that much of an amazing time, he would have been in touch. 

And I’m not sure going for the same guys your friend is will help you find the love of your life either.

Q: I broke up for 6 months now and discovered that my ex was sleeping with a friend while we were apart. Why am I upset?


A: Because you feel betrayed since your ex has moved on so quickly and has chosen a friend of yours to move on with (some friend!). 

Some people can’t bear to be alone and so it’s “any port in a storm” so it’s not necessarily that it’s a ‘big romance’. It may be a thing of convenience. 

But I can understand that it still hurts and that you may still have feelings for your ex. 

At least you know that it’s definitely over and can take steps to move on now and look for someone else yourself once the hurt has begun to subside. 

Six months is still pretty early days, especially if it was a long relationship. You need to be kind to yourself and surround yourself with friends you can trust. 

I always think it’s better to know the truth than to waste time on false hopes. And, if your ex does try to return, at least you’ll know that they didn’t think twice about hurting your feelings - and hopefully give them a wide berth.

How would you have responded to these questions? I'd love to know.  You can find more advice on my problem page here.

All materials included in this post are intended for informational purposes only. This post/information is not intended to and should not be used to replace medical or psychiatric advice offered by physicians or other health care providers. The author will not be liable for any direct, indirect, consequential, special, exemplary or other damages arising therefrom.


Share:

New Releases, Free & Bargain Books Link-up Week 41



How are you all this week?  We've one more week before Half Term here in Wales and the kids are definitely ready for it - and so am I.

We can't wait to get our Halloween costumes on and I hope you've checked out my great Halloween competitions (UK entries only though) on my competitions page.

This week I've been reading a book specially written for women in my age group (50+) called "The Fabulous @50 Re-experience" by Dianna Lee Bowes.  It's all about learning lessons from the experiences of our past to create a brighter, better future.  Look out for my review on 19th October.

Incidentally, I have a weekly advice column you may find of interest here.

Happy bargain and freebie hunting on this link.

Have a great week!

Sharing the Love of Books
Enjoy our selection of New Releases / Free & Bargain Books this week

Authors please feel free to add your own books
Readers please free to add your own finds
(any genre except erotica welcome)

This weekly link up is hosted by Beck Valley Books & these awesome book loving blogs...
Monday
 Life as Leels | IrishdaisylovesRomance | Book Babble | All Romance Reader
Tuesday
It's My Side of Life | Celticlady's Reviews | First Time Mommy Adventures 
Wednesday
Beck Valley BooksCinnamon Hollow Reviews
Thursday
Miki's Hope | Nicki's Nook
Friday
Ebook Addicts | I Love Romance | Mother Distracted | Colorimetry | The Ultimate Fan Blog
Saturday
Totally Addicted to Reading | 3 Partners in Shopping | Angie's Angle I Create Purty Thangs | Wishful Endings
Sunday
Lynchburg Mama | LibriAmoriMieiAli - The Dragon Slayer | Wondermom WannabeDeal Sharing Aunt | Rambling Reviews 


For Pre-orders post - PRE-ORDER / genre / title /author
For New Releases post - NEW / genre / title / author
For Free Books post - FREE / genre / title / author / end date 
For Bargain Books post - SALE / price / genre / title / author / end date
(Strictly no Erotica please.  Steamy romance is fine but watch those covers people, incase any underage child is viewing it!)

Click here for this weeks awesome selection!
Share:
Blog Design Created by pipdig