Say Thank You With Debenhams Flowers This Grandparents' Day (4th Oct) & Discount Code

It's Grandparents' Day on Sunday 4th October this year and what better way to say thank you for all they do than by sending a lovely bouquet of flowers?

My Lovely Mum, Kay & Her Moonlight Bouquet from Debenhams Flowers.

For working parents, grandparents are an invaluable source of trusted childcare. Recent research carried out by restaurant chain Table Table found that grandparents save parents an amazing £8,000 per year by babysitting their grandchildren and driving them around.

And research by the specialist over 50s insurer RIAS found that Britain's "Grandparent Army" of childcarers is now 9.1 million strong as the number of grandparent childminders has increased by 49% since 2009.

There's little doubt that parents owe them a huge debt!

I have to admit that Grandparents' Day seems to be a new annual celebration but I can see no reason why we should not take some time out to show our appreciation.  It is only too easy, if grandparents live a long way away, to let contact slip, perhaps only visiting around Christmas and birthdays. Another reason, I think why an extra day to share with them is a good idea.

The relationships our children have with their grandparents are often unique.  Having had to put up with my sister and I, our parents now combine many years of wisdom with a level of patience I can currently only dream of!  Both share their love of painting with the kids and my father, who teaches the piano, has been giving Caitlin lessons.  Ieuan will have lessons a little later on and I am hoping he will not have been too far indoctrinated by the Husband in the ways of "shouty Viking Rock" by then!

So bearing this in mind, I have been mulling over what to get them to say thank you on Grandparents' Day and flowers would seem to be an easy-to-please gift.

I was recently sent a lovely bouquet for my mum by Debenhams Flowers who have a great flower delivery service.  They offer next day flowers 7 days a week across the UK with a beautiful range of seasonal bouquets. For guaranteed next day flowers you need to order before 9pm on weekdays, 4pm on Saturdays and 2pm on Sundays.  Next day flowers are available by courier or you can choose flowers by post which are delivered in secure packaging by Royal Mail to any UK address.

You can send your best wishes with a personalised gift message delivered alongside the bouquet you choose and add a gift, for example chocolates, fine wines or balloons.

Debenhams Flowers suggested range for Grandparents' Day can be viewed here.

The bouquet I selected for my mum was the "Moonlight" - a lovely display of lilies, roses and carnations (£30.99).

As you can see, the picture above really doesn't do the bouquet justice.  It will be even more gorgeous when the lilies open.

DISCOUNT CODE FOR MY READERS

I am delighted to offer my lovely readers a discount code which entitles you to a very generous 25% off a bouquet (*Flowers By Post not included).

The code is: DFBLOG25.

Just go to www.debenhamsflowers.com.  You are sure to find a bouquet that suits.

I hope you and your family get to spend some quality time for the grandparents on Sunday 4th October.

*A "Moonlight" bouquet was received for the purposes of this review.

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Poor Health - It's Often The Letting People Down That's Hardest

It was a gleaming mint hybrid bicycle with a basket.  It sat beckoning, with a promise of endless summers freewheeling through fields filled with wild flowers. There were picnics to be had by bubbling streams, whilst lying on picnic blankets chewing straw and watching the clouds make wispy shapes in the matchless blue sky.

The husband was excited.  The kids were excited.  They all had bikes and were waiting for me to join them on the cycle paths. What could possibly go wrong?

Except.  Except.....

Back in the early 90's I had gynaecological surgery which has left me with what my consultant calls unprovoked vulvodynia.  This is a condition which is rarely written about and, as far as I can tell, its existence is frequently denied by the family of the sufferer, being so nebulous, difficult to treat and well nigh impossible to explain to someone who hasn't experienced it.  It is a persistent pain in your 'bits' which comes on for no particular reason.  Couple that with a bad back and my glasses OCD which means wearing any sort of headgear brings me out in a cold sweat, and you can see that I am hardly primed to join the ranks of the sporting elite any time soon.

After approximately 15 minutes trying out various saddles, it became clear that cycling was going to be a painful experience.

The bike went back.

I felt guilty and vaguely ashamed - as if I had let everybody down.  But you see it has taken me years to recover from the surgery (and since then I have had 2 caesarians) and the thought of undoing all the care I have had to take was too much to bear.

The experience led me to reflect that, for many of us dealing with daily health problems, whether it is a condition which comes with chronic pain or even if we are just dealing with a collection of what others might term 'health niggles', the impact of our suffering on others adds to the stress of the health complaint itself.

We are stuck between a rock and a hard place, desperately wanting our bodies to look, feel and behave like they did when we were young and struggling to understand how we ended up like this. It comes on gradually for some of us, doesn't it?  Lack of exercise, poor diet, poor sleep.  More than that, we want to join in and have a normal family life. We want the memories we create to be happy, fulfilled ones - not that time Mum put her back out and spent the afternoon sat in the car.

As mothers we get used to putting our own needs second to those of our children.  How many of us miss the weekend lie-in and get all misty eyed and nostalgic for the days when Sunday mornings started at noon. Weekends used to be times when we would recharge our batteries, both mentally and physically.  Times when we could, at least to some extent, get rid of any stress and strain which had built up over the preceeding week.

It makes it all the harder, then, when we can't acquiesce to our children's need to be ever active, ever pushing the boundaries of what their young bodies can achieve, but with us at their side.

I'm sure there is a compromise.  I am equally sure that self pity will get us nowhere either.  But occasionally, it is nice to hear that someone understands and gives you permission to acknowledge that, for whatever reason, you just can't join in.

And that's the permission we need to learn to give ourselves - without the bucket load of guilt that usually comes with it.

Further information on Vulvodynia is available on the NHS website.  Ladies, if you have any kind of unexplained pain or discomfort, please see your GP - and remember it is not all in your head. Nobody knows your body like you do!

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Beck Valley Book Tour & Giveaway - Return to me by Carolyn Menke

New Release....

Eighteen-year-old Sadie Stark, raised by the governor of Pennsylvania, has the world on a string. She doesn’t need the mother who left her any more than she needs the fiance who promises to change. What she needs is to finish college, and keep her wits about her. 

When war-bound James Pasko returns her stolen clutch, and shows her what’s missing in her life, she gains the courage to search for the truth about her past.

What Sadie uncovers rattles her to the core. But James’ steadfast love gives her hope for the future—for the first time—even as the war tears them apart.

When James disappears over enemy lines and Sadie makes a startling discovery, she must decide to follow in the footsteps of the mother who gave her away, or face a life of hardship like she’s never known.

Available to buy from....

Amazon.com   Amazon.co.uk   Barnes and Noble   Kobo

“A sweeping, romantic debut that brings the war-time forties to vivid life in this Titanic meets Philomena tale—fast-paced, tender, and real.” —RITA Award-winning Author Gwyn Cready

 “Menke’s writing is so lovely, you will want to wrap yourself in her words and savor each moment you spend in Sadie’s story. Return To Me will tug on your heart strings and take you on a journey back in time.” —Dana Faletti, Author of the Whisper Trilogy 

 “A timeless tale of love, loss and sacrifice that will equally break and warm your heart, as you cheer for the beautifully complex characters until the very last page.” —Lori M. Jones, Author of Renaissance of the Heart

So what did I think?

I'm not usually a romance fan but it was easy to get swept along by this moving tale of love spanning the decades including World War II.  The characters are believable and engaging, even though I found Sadie occasionally quite frustrating, constrained as she is in a world where feminism barely raised its head.  The theme of return is strong in the book, as is the idea that life is precious and incredibly brief.  The effects of the choices we make truly echo down the years and life continues to test us.  

A chance meeting throws Sadie and soldier James Pasko together just as he is going off to fight. Despite the fact that she is already promised to the thoroughly dislikable Henry,  the die has been cast and Sadie's life will never be the same.

Without spoiling the ending, Sadie's story mirrors that of the mother who gave her away as history seems to repeat itself.

If you are looking for a romance to escape into on a chilly autumn evening and you love stories from the 1940's, you will adore "Return to Me".

4 out of 5 stars.

About the Author

Carolyn Menke is the author of "A Little Known Truth" and "The Survival Guide to Mommy-hood," both published in "Beyond the Diaper Bag." Her flash fiction piece "Full Circle" took first place in the Writer's Type literary competition in July 2012. "Baba's Bananas" also placed first at Writer's Type in March 2011, and was later awarded first runner-up overall for the yearly competition in the same category.

A storyteller with an entrepreneurial spirit, she started a marketing communications business with clients ranging from local start-ups to Fortune 500 companies. Prior to that she worked as a marketing communications specialist for high-tech companies. She gained valuable public speaking experience while leading corporate and educational training workshops. Recently, she was a guest speaker at Wexford Elementary, and has been invited to share her latest novel, Return To Me, with area reading clubs.

The author earned a bachelor's degree in professional writing from Carnegie Mellon University and a master's degree in marketing communications from Duquesne University. She is a member of Pennwriters and two writing critique groups.

Find the author on the following sites...

Website    Facebook    Twitter    Pinterest    Goodreads 

Follow the book tour

I received this book to review through Beck Valley Books Book Tours, all the opinions above are 100% my own.

NOW FOR THE AUTHOR'S GIVEAWAY

Win a $20 Amazon.com GC / Paypal
(winners choice)
Open Worldwide

Ending on Sunday 4th October at 11.59pm EST

Enter Below and Good Luck !!
a Rafflecopter giveaway

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50 Ways To Wear A Scarf by Lauren Friedman

Did you know that, according to recent research, 30% of a woman’s wardrobe is wasted, meaning that she only wears 70% of what’s hanging up in her wardrobe.

Apparently we women are also guilty of not wearing the clothes we do have, with the average item of clothing being worn just 2-3 times a year, despite it being estimated that women buy 64 new items of clothing each year.

Whilst I'd like to know who these lucky women are, I have to confess I am rather welded into my black leggings when running after the kids.

It's really hard to keep up with the latest fashion trends as they change so quickly.  And who has the money to buy a whole new wardrobe each time you want to update your look? No.  The canny fashionista would advise that you can simply update your existing clothing with accessories.

Items like a scarf can be extremely versatile in how you wear them and I've found a lovely little book that challenges us to wear a scarf in 50 different ways - yes 50!

In my office days there would always be one woman who, upon switching off her PC, would don her coat and do something stylish with a scarf (often Burberry).  My own attempts would go as far as chucking a scarf around my neck and having done with it.

The 50 Ways to Wear a Scarf book by Lauren Friedman from Qwerkity.com (£9.99) shows how to wrap, loop, or tie a scarf to instantly dress up or dress down any outfit, helping you to discover the delights of styles such as the Bandit, Minnie Mouse, Ascot, New York, Boy Scout, babushka and 44 other fascinating styles.

The book shows you how to create these styles in easy steps, complete with illustrations, helping you to get the right look using oblong and square scarves.

OK, so I probably still need to practise but at least now I have 2 styles in my repertoire!

My version of No. 1 - The Bandit

Lauren Friedman's "50 Ways To Wear A Scarf" is a really clear and concise guide which gives you loads of ideas, even how to create a kimono and various ways you can wear a scarf in your hair. Unlike lots of the other style / wardrobe guides which are a two minute read and give you really basic ideas, this one really delivers in terms of fashion sense, creativity and ease of use.

Because the instructions are well illustrated and simple, the reader is given the confidence to try out styles of scarf you might not previously have considered.

I will definitely be giving some of the other styles a go.

Delft Blue Bird Scarf - £9.95

Petrol Blue Floral Scarf - £9.95

Multi-purpose Scarf (Teal or Pink) - £6.95

I have one copy of "50 Ways To Wear A Scarf" and a scarf to give away (design may vary).  Just enter via the Rafflecopter below.  The giveaway ends at 11:59 pm on Monday 12th October.  UK entrants only.  Good luck!

If you can't wait to start tying, the book is priced at just £9.99 and available on the Qwerkity website, where you'll find some great ideas for gifts for her - and him!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Further information is available at www.presentsformen.co.uk/qwerkity, on Facebook or on Twitter.

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Review: Hotel Tycoon Board Game - Move Over Hilton!

As is becoming customary on a Sunday, we gathered round for a session of board-game playing - this time trying out "Hotel Tycoon" from Esdevium Games.

We loved Disney Pictopia and Dobble so were looking forward to trying this one too.

Hotel Tycoon sees players try to buy and build the best hotels, earn the most money and bankrupt their opponents. And once you've secured your land and built your hotel, you can charge players who end up outside your hotel entrance.  The more luxurious your hotel, the more money your 'guest' has to pay.

The suggested age range for this one is 8+ and we found this to be right as it was a little too complex for Ieuan.

The other thing to bear in mind is that the game takes quite a bit of assembly (at least the first time around) as you have to build the hotels, which are assembled from cardboard cut-outs and add on roofs and bases.

We'd suggest putting the game together and then assembling the family if you are playing with younger children.

Like Monopoly, which I think is this game's nearest equivalent, Hotel Tycoon needs several plays before you get into the swing of buying your land, applying for planning permission, constructing hotels and nabbing properties off your opponents.

The game certainly has an intellectual element to it which older children will enjoy.  Caitlin, for example, loved having money from the bank and quickly understood the concept that the more land and hotels you had, the more likely you were to win.

When it's time to put the game away, there's a handy "cheat sheet" which shows you how to place your hotels back in the box without having to deconstruct them.

Hotel Tycoon is the kind of game which takes a good hour or so - it would be ideal on a rainy Christmas afternoon and I think the more you play it, the more you'll become hooked.

Here's how it works.



As usual, Caitlin managed to win by dint of buying everything in sight.  Ieuan just wanted the "Uptown" hotels to construct his own version of Hogwarts - which is where he is now.  Happily playing with all the hotels, building "Ieuan City" and shouting (I kid you not) - "Hurrah, I'm rich!".

Hotel Tycoon is available from Waterstones at £24.99 and is also available from Amazon.

For a review of two other great Esdevium games, Disney Pictopia and Dobble (and a Dobble giveaway), click here.

*A PR sample was received for the purposes of this review

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Win A Degustabox Of Foodie Treats

Degustabox is a monthly subscription food box service with each box containing between 9 and 14 products from well known and / or up-and-coming brands. Each box costs £12.99 including delivery and the value of the box contents is promised to be far greater than this, based on what you would expect to pay if you bought the items in the shops.

Once you have received your box, you are encouraged to review the products and let the brands know what you thought - whether you liked the item or not.

As with all monthly box subscription services (as you know I have regularly reviewed Glossybox, the monthly beauty box subscription service), the thrill is in the surprise of the contents and the anticipation of receiving a present just for you.  Yes I know you are supposed to share it but we mothers have to, er, vet the contents thoroughly, don't we?

I was sent the September box to try and it contains a lovely mix of sweet and even boozy treats. There is a selected list of products for each month published on the website but not everyone receives the same combination.

Here's what was in mine.

There was a mixture of brands I already knew but quite a few I'd heard of but not got round to trying. Actually, I think this box was designed specifically for me.

There were 8 products from September's selection and 2 which Degustabox call their "Db's Discoveries".

UP & GO Breakfast Drink & Complete® Energy Bites

Up & Go is a nutritious breakfast drink from Australia intended to replace a bowl of cereal and milk when you are rushing out of the door in the morning.  Complete® Energy Bites are low calorie chocolates infused with caffeine.  They say that 1 energy bite is the equivalent of a 1 large premium coffee.  I won't be trying these in the evening but they might be ideal for the mid afternoon, pre-school run slump!

Maynards Wine Gums, Bassets Jelly Babies, Mallow & Marsh Marshmallows and Reese's Peanut Butter Cups

I have to say that, although I am prepared to relinquish custody of the wine gums to the Husband, everything else in the above picture is mine - and if you haven't tried a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup, you really need to.

There was a pack of Maynards Red & Black Wine Gums, a pack of Bassets Jelly Babies in "Berry Mix", Reese's Peanut Butter Cups (peanut butter covered in Hershey's chocolate) and a raspberry marshmallow mini box from Mallow & Marsh.

The Good Cider of San Sebastian & Sweet Sally Tea

Lastly, there were two bottles of cider (1 apple, 1 pear) from Spanish cider producer The Good Cider of San Sebastian and a bottle of Sweet Sallly Tea, Ceylon black tea with Spanish oranges, Sicilian lemons, suger and a blend of cinnamon and cloves.  Both brands are new to me.

The 2 "DB's Discoveries" this month were Portlebay Popcorn (in cappuccino and sweet & salty flavours) and TG Green Tea (with Ginseng, and with Mandarin & Ginseng).

Portlebay Popcorn & TG Green Tea

Portlebay Popcorn is actually handmade in Devon using totally natural seasonings.  TG Green Teas are natural energy infusions which are low in sugar and contain 'good-for-you' ingredients.

Degustabox also include a cheat sheet detailing all the brands and what you could expect to pay for them in the supermarket and a couple of handy recipes to try out the contents of the box.

My only quibble is that my recipes were for soups - lovely but nothing in the box to make them with. One of the other listed products for September was a Greek olive oil from The Olive Shop which would have been used in both recipes so I'm not sure I got the right leaflet.

The total retail value of the box is £24.97, good value given the cost of the box was £12.99.  If you like the excitement of a monthly present and enjoy trying out new brands, I think Degustabox is a great scheme.  I'd place it firmly in the 'treat' category but the price is low enough to make it attractive.  Currently, if the four of us go for a coffee and a bun, for example, we usually end up paying around the £15 mark.  (Yes I know, find the thermos!).  A Degustabox subscription would also make a great gift.  You can cancel at any time, as long as you give them sufficient notice to stop next month's box.

Please note, though that Degustabox can only deliver to Mainland UK and not to Northern Ireland, the Scottish Highlands and Islands and you must be over 18 to order.

I have an October Degustabox to give away to one lucky winner and no, I can't tell you the contents because it will be a surprise.  Simply enter via the Rafflecopter below.  Sorry, but Mainland UK entrants only.  The giveaway will end at 11:59 pm on Friday 2nd October 2015.

If you don't win but would like to give Degustabox a try, I also have a discount code for first time subscribers for a very generous £6 off your first box. Simply enter BLDEG15 at checkout.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Reminder: all entrants need to be resident in mainland UK (excluding Northern Ireland and Scottish Highlands and Islands) and over 18.

Further information is available at the Degustabox UK website,  or you can talk to them on Facebook or on Twitter.

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Technology - Does It Bring Families Together, Or Push Them Apart?

Having a husband who works in the telecommunications industry means that our house possibly has more laptops, phones and things with screens than the average home.  It also means that our kids have been able to become IT savvy in a way those of us born in the 60's could only dream of.

I remember starting work for a shelving & racking company in the late 1980's and finding a brand new word processor sat on a desk with a dust cover on it because nobody knew how to use it.  I also remember the thrill of moving from a black and white television to a colour one.  Yes I am that, er, mature.

Technology has become so ingrained in our daily lives that we barely look up from our mobiles to see what's going on.

Last weekend, I attended a blogging event at a local hotel.  This was basically three tables of women all looking at their phones and photographing each other.  We are all now apparently obsessed with recording every detail of our lives to make it look #instacool.

And it's the same for kids.  Every restaurant, waiting room, in fact anywhere where people congregate will contain parents looking at their phones and children being kept mute by an iPad or Nintendo DS.

On the other hand, there is no denying that social media is a great uniter of people.  How many of us now talk to friends and relatives we have lost touch with over the years?  We can keep in touch via SKYPE.  There is actually, today, no excuse NOT to keep in touch.  And, conversely, no hiding place if you embrace as many social media platforms as I do.

The dark side of this is the danger it puts our children in. The temptation for parents to avoid the minimum age for Facebook is strong (it's 13 by the way) - and I know parents who start accounts in, say the pet's name so that the child can have a social media presence.  Peer pressure is usually cited as the reason the child has to have a presence.  Cyber bullying is a growing problem as is sexting with children as young as 11 and 12 sending indecent pictures of themselves, not realising that these snaps will never vanish from the internet.

Then there's the pressure from children to have a mobile phone.  The jury is still out on whether or not mobiles can cause brain cancer but the advice is not to let children have mobiles near their still developing brains. Because we play on our phones we think of them are toys.  But toys they most certainly are not.

Parents need a new set of skills to teach children how to deal with these issues - not always so easy when you are not particularly good at understanding social media yourself.  We are being forced to address issues such as sex education and pornography much earlier than in previous decades.  In many ways our children's innocence is being eroded by the advancement of technology and it is becoming harder to protect them.

In the evening, how many families now sit around a dining table to eat together and talk about their day?  And how many are sat on sofas in front of the TV?  When the kids are in bed, having spent the last hour of the day on their iPads or gaming in their bedrooms, how many couples sit and chat and how many have a PC on their lap and are in their own social media worlds?  I have to confess that the Husband and I are guilty of this.

We know that excessive screen use before bed interferes with our ability to go to sleep and that's without the stress of exposure to bad news on TV or the pressures of work and school.

There's no denying that technology has revolutionised almost every aspect of our daily lives.  Our kitchens are groaning with gadgets to make food production quicker.  We have fridge / freezers you could hide an ox in.  Our cars are now basically mobile computers which move fast.  We read books on screen.  Films and TV are always available on our phones.

But what are we doing with the time we've saved?

Mostly spending more time on the internet, creating our own little worlds where interaction seems real, but is not.  Where we kid ourselves we have lots of friends and followers, many of whom we will never meet and who certainly would not recognise us in the street.

And we are teaching our kids that this is an effective use of their spare time, instead of playing with them, talking to them, encouraging them to play outside.  We are failing to teach them the skill of making 'real' friends, making small talk and taking an interest in what is really going on in their lives.

I have a love / hate relationship with technology.  It's brought me great friends and great experiences. But I am well aware that this has come at a cost, that cost being less time spent with my kids creating memories in the real, rather than the virtual, world.

I think we need to learn how to control the technology in our lives, before it starts to control us.  And, given Professor Stephen Hawking's fear, voiced just yesterday, that we need to get to grips with Artificial Intelligence before it out-thinks humans, now may be a very good time indeed to switch off and have a reboot - in the good old-fashioned sit-down-with-the-kids-and-chat type of way.

This article first appeared as a guest post for Hello Mamas, the US mum meet mum website coming to the UK very soon.

Like what you've read?  Why not join me on the Mother Distracted Facebook page, tweet me on @lindahobbis or follow me on Instagram.

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