Win Football Artwork T-Shirts For Dad & Child From Art of Football

If you are looking for something a little bit out of the ordinary for Father's Day (Sunday 18th June), take a look at www. art-of-football.com, a unique clothing and artwork site which offers a range of t-shirts, sweatshirts, prints and canvases featuring your favourite football stars in artwork painted by a number of designers.

The boys enjoying a friendly game

Art of Football has a very interesting philosophy. All of their designs have been thoughtfully made primarily as a piece of art to do justice to those moments of high energy and elation which mean so much to fans.  The designs aim to capture all the raw emotion and energy felt during those seconds of celebration and to capture these with style.

They want to move away from the majority of football T-shirts that feature generic, screen-printed images of footballers like Luis Suarez to create something really unique.

You can even send in those sporting moments that mean the most to you via a contact page to suggest a new design they might like to feature.

Football isn't the only sport they feature, however, there's also boxing and rugby.  It's easy to choose your favourite as you can pick your favourite team using a drop down box.

We were sent two t-shirts to try.  Mat's features the legendary Ronaldinho.

Both the names of the garments and their descriptions are rather special too.  Here's the description of the Ronaldinho t-shirt / sweatshirt.

Art of Football Ronaldhino T-Shirt - £25

“No one can compare to Ronaldinho. I remember his plays, his dribbles. I remember him winning every title at the Camp Nou. He made history at Barca, he made history with Brazil and he’s still making history.” — Neymar Jr

“I’ve worked with some great players in my time and all at a very interesting period in their careers, nineteen to twenty years old. But, with due respect to the others, Ronaldinho was a cut above the rest.” — Celso Roth, Ronaldinho’s coach at Gremio, his first club"
Ieuan's t-shirt is called Enter The Dragon which celebrates Wales qualifying for the Euros last year. Here's the description and there's even a YouTube link to relive the moment captured on the t-shirt. This particular design is also available as a print.

Enter The Dragon Kids' T-Shirt - £14.99

"After a superbly exciting campaign Wales reached the finals of a major tournament for the first time since 1958 as they head for France and Euro 2016. Here the superstars Bale and Ramsey celebrate but this was a team effort from the boys in red. Having beaten one of the favourites Belgium along the way, they fear no-one. History beckons.

Relive it : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0OaWTEoYGIM"

Made of soft and good quality cotton and beautifully packaged in retro football paper, these would make a great Father's Day gift for the football obsessed dad which is really something quite special.

The Giveaway

I have one adult t-shirt and one child's t-shirt of your choice to give away - a perfect gift for a footie mad dad (or mum!) and their son (or daughter!).  Great for Father's Day or just to celebrate your love of The Beautiful Game.

Entry is via the Rafflecopter and the usual terms and conditions apply which can be viewed on my competitions page.  The giveaway is open to UK entrants only and ends at 11:59 pm on Sunday 11th June.

Entrants MUST answer all the mandatory questions - and yes, I do check.



a Rafflecopter giveaway
Good luck!

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6 Things Children Learn In Dance Class That Aren't Dancing

When I was young I used to love my ballet lessons.  It was a discipline I learned and studied up until the age of 16 and I honestly believe the effects it had on my posture and shape have lasted till today.

No wonder then that ballet is undergoing a sort of renaissance, particularly among older dancers and barre work-outs are springing up all over the country.

Credit: Ian Cook, IJC Sports Photography

Caitlin is currently studying for her Grade 3 Royal Academy of Dance and adores her ballet, not least because she has a kind and patient teacher, Mrs Nicola Peros, who really wills her pupils to succeed. 

There's no doubt that girls love the dance-wear, the ribbons, the shoes and the tutus but leading dancewear provider, Dancewear Central has uncovered that there’s so much more to dance classes than meets the eye!

On the surface, all parents may see is writing endless cheques, taxiing to and from lessons several times a week, buying shoes and leotards, and sewing costumes. But the reality is that children get so much more from attending dance lessons than the technical skills, so parents are getting far more value for money than they initially think!

With this in mind, Dancewear Central spoke to dance experts across the country to discover the biggest benefits of dancing, and why there’s more to classes than meets the eye.

1. Patience

Children aren’t the most patient creatures in the world – any parent can attest to that. And the younger they are the less patient they seem to be! Throw an exciting dance class into the mix – where they get to run around and burn off that excess energy – and it suddenly becomes harder to keep them still.

Dancers, both professional and amateur, constantly have to wait their turn, whether they’re moving across a stage, free-styling or demonstrating an individual move. Knowing when it’s your turn to move and then to be still and quiet while another has their go is a skill we use long into adulthood.

The sooner children learn when to take their turn, the sooner they’ll learn to interact better with others. Conflicts will be reduced and their social skills will blossom.

2. Confidence

As children learn to dance, hone their technique and take a performance from start to finish, their confidence grows. Add that to gaining a better sense of their bodies and feeling more comfortable in their own skin, and their self-esteem will skyrocket. They’ll learn how to express themselves, which is really what dancing is all about, and it’s what separates it from other physical activities. It gives kids a physical outlet for their emotions, a place to be themselves, and they’re encouraged to be proud of that.

Says Nicola Peros, principal at Nicola Peros Ballet "The first thing that children experience when they start ballet is bravery. They aren't always with friends and they don't know the teacher.

They learn discipline, they are guided and encouraged to learn the steps which give them skills and confidence. They gain a sense of self-confidence and pride in their bodies and what they can accomplish.

They learn how to work to get what they want out of their performances."

Johanna Hadley, teacher at Janet Lomas School of Dancing, says that increased confidence through dance is something children will take with them into later life:

“I myself have seen students who were once shy and withdrawn grow in confidence – in later years they have blossomed into beautiful dancers, happy and willing to perform in front of large audiences.

“A student who has regularly walked into a dance examination room or performed on stage will be unfazed by the university admissions process, job interviews and public speaking. Dance teaches the ability to present oneself in an assured and professional manner, and the weekly attendance of these classes demonstrates both dedication and commitment.”

Capezio Cross Over Top

3. The way the body works

Kids are curious creatures, and they love to learn about the world around them. Put them in a class where their body does wonderful things like moving to music, and they’ll be eager to learn more about how they actually do it. And this can stand them in good stead for later life.

Naomi Wallen, owner of Dance Matters, a community dance school says that learning about the body through dance can influence children’s future path: 

“When you know how a body jumps, you can jump higher, farther, quicker. Introducing the concepts of anatomy when the children are young will allow them to build upon this foundation in the future. They will learn that there is more to their bodies than what they see in the mirror. 

“If a child becomes intrigued by their body, they may develop a life path for themselves. I know former dancers who are now doctors, nurses, midwives, physiotherapists and pharmacists. Additionally, if a child learns how amazing their body is, their relationship with their body can be a positive one. Body image is a difficult part of the lives of children and young adults – any opportunity to embrace the brilliance of our bodies is worth the work.”

4. Improved social skills

Dancing isn’t all about the individual – even in more solo disciplines such as ballet or tap. As part of their class, children will be asked to communicate and cooperate with their fellow students, both in pairs and in groups. For shy children, in particular, dancing can be a really big help and encourage them to come out of their shell as they talk to others and make new friends. 

Debbi Fullilove believes that people often underestimate that dance can take soft skills straight back to basics: 

“Dance is about encouraging children to have fun, while increasing basic core skills that can benefit them in future life. This includes verbal communication through socialising with their peers, listening skills, and also encouraging them to take ideas and develop them.”

5. Friendship

Improved social skills are just one branch of dance, and dancing often requires children to work together. Making friends comes easy to children – they seem to be able to talk to anyone and at any time! So place them in a room full of similarly aged children where their only job is to move to music, and they’re bound to interact and before you know it they’ve formed a bond.

Naomi Wallen believes that friendship is one of the biggest benefits that children take out of the dance studio:

“They learn how to be friends with people who aren’t the same as them. Our classes are mixed gender. Some have a range of ages, and some dancers have learning disabilities. The children discover how community is a gorgeous thing and how role models can be found in unexpected places. 

Learning how to socialise with others from an early stage is a vital part of a child’s cognitive development. Dance brings together children from a variety of backgrounds and personalities, creating an environment outside of the child’s comfort zone. Children are encouraged to learn to adapt, connect and communicate in new ways. They learn to build trust and effective relationships.”

Roch Valley Funky Dance Hold All 

6. A healthy body

Children weren’t made to sit still, but watching television or playing video games can turn from an occasional treat into a daily habit. Dancing gets them out of the house on a regular basis, and while you may not be looking for your kids to lose weight, it helps to keep their heart, and brain, healthy.

Giving children the confidence and encouragement to move while they’re young will give them a taste for physical activity that they carry with them into later life. Whether they become a professional dancer or not, they might continue with amateur classes as an adult or migrate to a completely different sport – it doesn’t matter as long as they move.

Debbi Fullilove, who owns Yorkshire-based Dance Stars UK, shared her thoughts:

“Encouraging children to dance is much more than just the physical element, exercise and getting children away from an indoor environment. Children have a thirst to learn and develop, and dance – from musical theatre to street dance – is a great way of helping them grow and come out of their shell.

“In a day and age where many children are scared of how they may be accepted, there is nothing more rewarding as a dance teacher than seeing them flourish.”

I would heartily recommend ballet as a discipline for kids.  In an age where technology is seeming taking over, it's great to find something which creates health, discipline and an appreciation for music - without the use of an iPad and, in my experience, the skills you learn are with you forever.

Further information about the Nicola Peros Ballet School which serves Cardiff and Barry is available at www.nicolaperosballet.com.

For a great selection of dance wear go to www.dancewearcentral.co.uk.

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Charnos Hosiery SS17 Collection: Funky Tights That Fit!

These days I rarely depart from my mum uniform of t-shirt, leggings and socks, much to Caitlin's increasing displeasure, but when I do dress up, it's usually a dress and either tights or hold-ups.

I often find myself in Marks & Spencer's hosiery department and rely on their trusty hold-ups because the sizing is generous and the prices reasonable.

I have not, I must confess, ventured towards any other hosiery brand for a long time, generally because I have found the sizing constrictive and the finer the denier, the more likely I am to put my finger through them or scag them on something.

I also have quite long legs which means lots of tights struggle to get past mid thigh or, if they do, are a little tight round the old mum tum.

Charnos Hosiery kindly sent me a selection from their new Spring Summer 2017 collection to try and I was expecting the usual problems but not a bit of it.

CAEV Floral Net Tights 

Not only is the quality excellent but they fitted perfectly (I tried the medium to large size).  They came up to my waist comfortably, the elasticated waistband was generous and I didn't have to wrestle them over my thighs.

CAGO Floral Tights

I tried three pairs of their patterned tights, the material of which was quite strong and resilient. There is a cotton gusset, which was a bonus I wasn't expecting and a reinforced toe to add extra durability. All retail around the £8 - £10 mark per pair.

I was a bit worried that the patterns would be overwhelming but actually they are quite funky without being over the top.

CAGJ Diamond Net Tights

I was also sent some of their lovely comfy socks to try which the Husband was very pleased about as he's always moaning about the fact I wear his.  Having size 8 feet often makes mens' socks a better bet as for some strange reason lots of ladies' socks only go up to a size 7.

These fitted fine, although they could have been a little bigger for the longer toed among us (I know, I know - feet, don't you just love them?), but they are lovely and soft and come a decent way up the leg.

CGBH Geo and Stripe Sock in Rose Mix

The range also includes sheer tights, knee highs, spotted and diamond patterns and natural tan tights. I keep promising myself I may actually try a spray tan but haven't got around to it yet so the latter have been added to my shopping list.  We redheads very rarely go very brown without help.

Would I buy these?  Yes I would - they're a great way to add a bit of an edge to a conservative date night dress or perk up your office wear without going over the top.

You can find out more at www.charnoshosiery.co.uk where you will find a list of stockists, or you can connect with Charnos on Facebook or Twitter.

*PR samples were received for the purpose of this post.

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New Releases, Free & Bargain Books Link-up Week 20 2017

How are you all this week?  Oh happy day, the kids' tests are over (at least in Wales) so they can relax a bit and concentrate on Caitlin's least favourite day of the whole year - sports day.  I used to hate it too but obviously I have to pretend it's all jolly good fun and character building.

We're off to Devon in a couple of weeks so I'm bracing myself for the packing and bulk buying of toiletries and medication (despite the fact we're only going for a week).

Just in case the weather is, how shall I put it, typically British, we'll be taking loads of books to read and I will trying to prize the kids sticky fingers off their iPads so they can do some reading too.

If you are looking for a great new book, I have just reviewed In Doubt by the incomparable John W. Mefford. This is an Ivy Nash thriller, a new detective for me and in this one, Ivy must protect a little girl from a wealthy egomaniac hell-bent on revenge. You can read my review here.

As usual, there are more great books on the linky - and don't forget you can always add your own to spread a bit of the book love.

Don't forget that I still have plenty to be won on my competitions page and don't forget my problem page here.

Happy bargain and freebie book hunting on this link.

Have a great week!

Sharing the Love of Books
Enjoy our selection of New Releases / Free & Bargain Books this week

Authors please feel free to add your own books
Readers please free to add your own finds
(any genre except erotica welcome)

This weekly link up is hosted by Beck Valley Books & these awesome book loving blogs...
Monday
 Life as Leels | IrishdaisylovesRomance | Book Babble | All Romance Reader
Tuesday
It's My Side of Life | Celticlady's Reviews | First Time Mommy Adventures 
Wednesday
Beck Valley Books | Cinnamon Hollow Reviews
Thursday
Miki's Hope | Nicki's Nook
Friday
Ebook Addicts | I Love Romance | Colorimetry | The Ultimate Fan Blog | Mother Distracted
Saturday
Totally Addicted to Reading | 3 Partners in Shopping | Angie's Angle | I Create Purty Thangs | Wishful Endings
Sunday
Lynchburg Mama | LibriAmoriMiei | Ali - The Dragon Slayer | Wondermom Wannabe | Deal Sharing Aunt | Rambling Reviews 

For Pre-orders post - PRE-ORDER / genre / title /author

For New Releases post - NEW / genre / title / author

For Free Books post - FREE / genre / title / author / end date 

For Bargain Books post - SALE / price / genre / title / author / end date
(Strictly no Erotica please.  Steamy romance is fine but watch those covers people, incase any underage child is viewing it!)

Click here for this weeks awesome selection!

*this post contains an affiliate link

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Beck Valley Book Tour: In Doubt (Ivy Nash Thriller) by John W. Mefford

NEW RELEASE....


When lives are shattered, can the bond of friendship survive the suspicion of guilt?

Just as she feels her world caving in around her, Ivy Nash realizes that there are no guarantees in life...for her or for those she cares about.

Ivy must protect an adorable little girl from a wealthy egomaniac hell-bent on revenge, as a monster from Cristina's past returns with a fury.

When the dust settles, will those that live have any life to speak of? And will Ivy ever be able to stop looking over her shoulder for the man she knows will never stop until she's destroyed?

Available to buy from....
Amazon.com   Amazon.co.uk   Barnes and Noble    iBooks   Kobo   Paperback

"Rife with deceit and deception and characters that leap off the page, this story is told with confidence through a sure hand, engaging both the mind and the heart. A compelling treat." -- Steve Berry, New York Times Bestselling Author

"I love the way that Mefford writes, seamlessly jumping between characters and time frames with no confusion, and he is extremely descriptive of the setting . You almost feel like you are watching a movie instead of reading a book!" -- Hilary Mahoney, Elusive Red Tiger

"Mefford wrote her character with depth and you can feel her passion for her job throughout the entire book." -- Shelly Maynard, Lynchburg Mama

Above reviews from An Ivy Nash Thriller, Book 1, IN Defiance


My Review

This was my first Ivy Nash thriller and, after Booker and Alex Troutt I wondered if I would be equally impressed by another Mefford detective but he's done it again.  Where John gets his energy for writing from, I have no idea but In Doubt fizzes off the page with characters drawn with his usual realism and a villain (or two) that you really want to see behind bars.

Ivy and her partner, Cristina are younger than his previous main characters and the fact that Ivy is not (yet at any rate) working as part of the police adds interest.  As Ivy works to protect the adorable Emma she is trying to unravel her conflicting feelings for the little girl's billionaire father whilst fighting off a shadowy figure who is out to get her.  

Every time you think you have things worked out, Mefford throws another spanner into the works until the story builds to a great conclusion.

The supporting characters such as Stan, Zeke and Pudge are all described so thoroughly that you can visualise them.  As another reviewer has said, you could easily believe you were watching a movie.

This is a thriller in which the reader's perception of each suspect shifts constantly - leaving you very much in doubt - until the very end.

High recommended.

Books in the Alex Troutt Thriller Series:

AT Bay AT Large

AT Once

AT Dawn

AT Dusk

AT Last

Books in the Ivy Nash Thriller Series:

IN Defiance

IN Pursuit
IN Doubt
Coming soon....

Break IN

IN Control

IN The End

Q&A with author John W. Mefford: 
Q: What do the Ivy Nash Thrillers have to do with the Redemption Thriller Series?

JWM: The Ivy Nash Thrillers comprise the second sub-series in the Redemption Thriller Series. The Alex Troutt Thrillers are the first sub-series. While I'll eventually write a series that connects the major characters and plots from all the sub-series, you don't have to read the AT books prior to the IN books. But I have to say, the AT thrillers are darn good.

Q: So you're saying you don't have to read the Alex Troutt Thrillers before the Ivy Nash Thrillers?

JWM: Nope. While a few of the characters might occasionally overlap between the series, they can be read as stand-alone. And then I'll wrap everything up in a final set of six novels that connects all of the main characters and stories from each sub-series. If you haven't read any of the Alex Troutt thrillers yet, you can try out the first three at a pretty nice discount. Just search for Alex Troutt Box Set.

Q: Can you give some insight into how Ivy Nash might connect to Alex Troutt down the line?

JWM: Sure…and then I'll send over a hit squad. Seriously, I'll be sprinkling in a few clues along the way for those who pay close attention to the details, but it will all come together in that final six novels of the Redemption Thriller Series. And it will be explosive and gut-wrenching at the same time.

Q: How many different sub-series are you planning to have in the Redemption Thriller Series?

JWM: Right now, I see four sub-series in the Redemption Thriller Series, with six novels in each. It's the most challenging and fulfilling creative endeavor I've undertaken. I hope you enjoy the journey.

About the Author

A veteran of the corporate wars, former journalist, and true studier of human and social behavior, best-selling author John W. Mefford has been writing novels since he first entered the work force twenty-five years ago, although he never put words on paper until late 2009.

John writes novels full of intrigue, suspense, and thrills, but they also evoke an emotional connection with the characters.

When he’s not writing, he chases three kids around, slaves away in the yard, reads, takes in as many sports as time allows, watches all sorts of movies, and continues to make mental notes of people and societies across the land.

John lives in Frisco, Texas with his beautiful wife, three opinionated kids, and a feisty fat cat who rules the world.

"Pop on over to my Website, Facebook, Twitter, Google+, Goodreads and Amazon Author Page"

Join John's Readers’ Group and receive the first novels in both the Greed and Booker Series 

Follow the tour

I received this book through Beck Valley Books Book Tours, I have volunteered to share my review and all the opinions are 100% my own.

NOW FOR THE AUTHOR'S GIVEAWAY

Win IN Doubt by John W Mefford ebook
3 Winners!!
Ending on Sunday 4th June at 11.59pm CST

Open Worldwide 

Enter HERE

Good Luck !!

Are you a book reviewer or book blogger? Join our book tours reviewers team - Apply Here x

Current book tours open for sign ups HERE

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Quick and easy mid-week lunch ideas when the kids are at home

The summer holidays are fast approaching and while the idea of six weeks free from school runs, after school activities and ferrying Caitlin and Ieuan back and forth to their various engagements is appealing, I have to find fun activities to stop them crawling the walls and coax them away from their beloved iPads.

The holidays also mean I need to whizz up extra lunches mid-week, which got me thinking – let’s find some quick and easy lunch ideas that the kids can get involved in too. Children love getting dirty in the kitchen and gain a real sense of responsibility and pride when they tuck into their produce, plus it’s something we can do together. Check out our favourite fast but healthy meal ideas we’ll be creating over the holidays.

Homemade baked beans on toast

Baked beans are a British staple and homemade ones are so much more delicious than the tinned variety, as well as being simple to make. Toast a slice of your favourite freshly baked bread, cover with lashings of butter et voila. Lunch is served.

Ingredients:
1 large onion
1 red pepper
1 garlic clove
2 x 400 g tins of beans (borlotti, kidney, black eyed)
2 x 400g tins of chopped tomatoes
Balsamic vinegar

Method:
Soften the onion and pepper in a splash of olive oil before adding the garlic. Add your chosen beans and chopped tomatoes to the pan and simmer on a low heat for 10 minutes until the mixture has thickened. Season with a splash of balsamic vinegar, salt and pepper.

Homemade beef burgers and chips

Everyone craves comfort food from time to time and burgers and chips are a real family favourite in our household. Homemade burgers beat shop bought ones every time –they’re easy to make and can easily be freezed before cooking should you have leftover mixture. Team with some crispy sweet potato fries and serve with a fresh, green salad.

Ingredients:
400g premium lean beef mince
1 clove garlic
1/2 medium red onion
1/2 tsp olive oil
1/8 tsp dried oregano
McCain Sweet Potato Fries
Salad to garnish

Method:
Combine the minced beef and garlic in a bowl and season with salt and pepper. Form into four 1cm thick patties and grill for five minutes on each side. Meanwhile thinly slice the onion, sprinkle with oregano and grill until slightly brown. Place the patties in bread rolls and top with the onion, adding fries and salad on the side.

Falafel wraps

Falafel make for really healthy and tasty fast food, packed with protein and lots of exciting flavours. Serve with soft tortilla bread and load up your homemade wraps with charred veggies, salsa and hummous.

Ingredients:
1 x 400 g tin of mixed beans
1 x 400 g tin of chickpeas
1 lemon
1 tablespoon harissa
1 heaped teaspoon allspice
1 heaped tablespoon plain flour
1 bunch of fresh coriander

Method: Drain the chickpeas and beans and place them in a food processor along with all the other ingredients. Blitz until smooth before removing the mixture and shaping into around eight patties about 1.5 cm thick. Fry the falafel in a little olive oil until golden brown and crispy and then get busy loading up your wraps with your chosen fillings.



Macaroni cheese
Macaroni cheese is a super easy and budget friendly meal, perfect for hungry teenagers and parents alike. Smooth and creamy, this is a big hit with the little ones too. Again, if you make too much, this dish can easily be frozen and reheated later in the week.

Ingredients:
250g macaroni
1 tbsp butter
1 tbsp plain flour
450ml milk
180g Cathedral City Mature Cheddar (grated)
1 tsp black pepper
1 tsp mustard powder

Method:
Cook the macaroni according to the packet instructions, drain and place to the side. On a low heat, melt the butter and add the plain flour, black pepper and mustard powder, stirring all the time. Add the milk a little at a time using a whisk to prevent lumps and bring to the boil to thicken the sauce. Add a big handful of grated cheese before mixing in the drained pasta. Place in a large oven proof dish, sprinkle with more cheese and bake for 10 minutes at 180C and voila, lunch is served!

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Problem Page Edition 19 2017

This week - texting a girl friend when you know her boyfriend disapproves, whether being short and ugly stops you finding love and whether your therapist has overstepped the mark.

If you would like any advice, feel free to treat me as your agony aunt. Just message me or pop a comment in the comment box at the end of this post. I promise to be gentle.

Here are this week's questions.

Q: Today, my therapist said I’ll probably divorce my husband in the near future. Now I just want to prove him wrong. Is my reaction normal? 

I feel really weird but this is how my brain works. There's no doubt that my marriage is in a bad shape but surely working to save my marriage just to prove my therapist wrong is abnormal?

A:It sounds to me like your relationship with your therapist is slightly screwed and you are treating them like a parent. 

It is really not for anybody to tell you to end your marriage. That is a decision for you and you alone. 

A good therapist will help you identify the issues in your marriage and gently suggest ways in which you could improve things But suggesting you need to leave your marriage sounds to me rather unethical. 

Frankly I would change your therapist before you change your husband.

Q: Is it disrespectful to a platonic female friend’s boyfriend if we text each other on a regular basis? 

My friend, who has a very jealous boyfriend (and she is very jealous too), started distancing herself from me and told me that she feels it is disrespectful to her boyfriend for us to text each other and talk to each other as much as we do. We were very good friends.

A: Well if I were the boyfriend, I’d be annoyed and I’m sure you know that. 

I think if you are a good friend to this girl you will understand that your friendship is threatening her relationship and take a step back for a while. 

You surely don’t need to text each other daily. Or is there a little more going on here? 

Are you hoping that she becomes your girlfriend? In which case you need to broach this with her to find out where you stand.

Q: How can I feel better about the fact that I'm short, ugly, and literally no woman will ever like me?

A:It didn’t stop Napoleon, or Genghis Khan (also short) did it? 

Looks aren’t everything. Intelligence, kindness and interest in your partner will take you further than a 6 pack every time. 

I’ll bet you are not as plain as you’re making out. Everyone has something about them. 

I’d suggest you read a few books about the Law of Attraction too - what you give out you get back.

Start acting like a handsome devil and you may be surprised at the attention you get.

Q:Can people with dyslexia form friendships or relationships with other people?

A: Well of course they can. 

It sounds as if you are suffering from a massive crisis in confidence when there is really no need. 

Do you have anyone you can talk to about this? Is there a dyslexia support group nearby? A good place to find support is the British Dyslexia Association who have a helpline (0333 405 4567).

Are there any support groups near you, or is there a dyslexia forum on Facebook where you can chat to others? 

You really aren’t alone with this you know.

Q: Should I get her number from someone else? 

I talked to her last week and asked her out in person. We had a great conversation. She said she wanted to meet next Saturday but would text me about it. She asked for my number but she never texted me. I never got her number. Should I get her number from one of my friends who has it?

A: I think you have to accept that she probably isn’t all that interested - or she has got cold feet. 

Next time why not enter her phone number direct into your phone? 

If you can get her number from your friend I think that’s fine since she has yours but be prepared if you text and hear nothing. 

I think the moment has passed with this one I’m afraid.

Q: If a guy always seems really happy to see you (but you don't see him very often) and you seem to have natural, friendly conversations, why would he quite clearly angle his body away from you part of the time and not stop to say goodbye when he leaves later on?

A: The logical answer is that he’s just being polite.

When we are really interested in someone, we can’t help but give the game away with our body language.

I’ve written about it in this post 32 Way to tell they’re just not that into you Mother Distracted: 32 Ways To Tell They're Just Not Into You

Of course it’s possible he is shy and awkward but not saying goodbye just sounds plain rude to me.

How would you have responded to these questions? I'd love to know. You can find more advice on my problem page 

Disclaimer: All materials included in this post are intended for informational purposes only. This post/information is not intended to and should not be used to replace medical or psychiatric advice offered by physicians or other health care providers. The author will not be liable for any direct, indirect, consequential, special, exemplary or other damages arising therefrom. 

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Not Just Mum: Staying You When You Become a Parent

Becoming a parent changes your life. There's no getting around that, and you're not going to be exactly the same person again. A lot of people will pledge to never change or to be cool parents, but they soon discover it doesn't turn out that way. However, just because being a parent changes you, it doesn't mean you have to become someone else entirely. And you certainly don't have to be just a parent. Many mums worry about losing themselves when they have their first child and becoming nothing but a mum. Even though being a mum is part of your identity, you don't want it to be your entire identity. A new baby (or an adopted older child) can be all consuming, but you can still hold onto who you are.

Keeping Up Your Social Life

One of the things that are immediately at risk when you become a parent is your social life. And it's one of the worst times to lose it. Being a new mum can be lonely, especially when leaving the house can be a struggle. When you become a parent, keeping up with friends who aren't parents can be difficult too. There are places you can't go to anymore, and they might not enjoy spending time with your child all the time. A large challenge of maintaining your social life is simply finding the time to see people.

So what can you do about these things? How do you stay in touch with your friends and spend time with them now you're a parent? One thing to keep in mind is that it's a good time to find out who your real friends are. While you should make an effort to continue being a good friend, your friends also need to be understanding of your new situation. You might find yourself getting closer to fellow parents. Another thing to think about is getting time with just your friends - no baby in tow. It gives you time for yourself, and your friends get to see you without everything being about kids.



From Public Domain Pictures (Petr Kratochvil)

Making New Friends

Becoming a parent can mean that you lose friends, or that the dynamics of your friendships change. It's a good idea to consider finding new friends, not just who are parents but who share your interests too. Your new friends won't necessarily even be parents, but they're friends you make when you're a parent, which can make a difference. It's sad when you lose touch with your pre-kids friends, but if you're at different stages in your life, it's perfectly natural. New friends could fit into your life much better because you're not trying to change existing relationships to fit.

Continuing Your Career

Continuing to build your career becomes tough when you're a parent. If you take time out of work, it can take years to get back to the same point in your career you were at pre-children. Having kids can affect how easy it is to grow your salary and reach more senior positions, and unfortunately, it affects women much more than men. If you have hopes of continuing your career on the same path, there are lots of things you'll need to do.

One essential thing is to know your rights at work when it comes to parental leave. If you look at http://www.elliswhittam.com/anatomy-of-a-maternity-leave-policy you can see what sort of things need to be in a maternity leave policy. You also need to think about how to balance parenting and work. One thing to consider is whether it's you doing all the "balancing", or if your partner has to compromise too. Who leaves work and picks the kids up from school if they're ill, for example?




From Flickr (Batle Group)

Have Time to Yourself

Getting time to yourself is important if you want to keep your identity as an individual. It gives you time to enjoy hobbies, or just to relax and get some peace. To get some time to yourself, however, you need someone to look after your child. If you're sharing parenting duties, you've got someone who can help right away. If not, you might have family members or friends who can help out. If you want time to yourself, it does sometimes mean having to face anxiety about leaving your child with another person. It can be hard, but it's also healthy. Time on your own could be at home or out of the house.

Becoming a mum doesn't mean you have to lose yourself. It does change you, but you can still be an individual, as well as a parent.

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Win A Frenzy FR145 Recreational Scooter For Dad This Father's Day

If you're looking for something a bit different for your dad on Father's Day (Sunday 18th June), I have just the thing to not only get him mobile but get him to work a bit quicker too.

The lovely people at Skates.co.uk are offering a fabulous big foldable scooter, just the thing for getting around on - the Frenzy 145mm Recreational Scooter worth £80.

The brand new Frenzy FR145 145mm Recreational Scooter is a perfect choice for anyone who wishes to make their commuting life easier!

The scooter folds down for easy storage, has a kick stand and a carry strap for easy transportation and feature 145mm wheels for speed and comfort.

The maximum rider weight is 100kg and the maximum bar height is 97.5 cm.

You also get a free bonus pack which includes:

Full Scooters Stickers Sheet with 36 stickers (including the top brands: Apex, MGP, River, Roots, Drone, Supremacy, Elite, Fasen, Raptor, AO, Dare, Tilt, Proto, Hellagrip, Ethic, Flavor, Blunt/Envy, Dare, Logic, Scooter Jam Series, Skates.co.uk) and a multicoloured Skates.co.uk wristband.

There's no doubt that dad will look a lot cooler than the husband did last year on my lovely Skates.co.uk skateboard.

But if skateboards are dad's thing, he might want to relive his youth on his own skateboard such as the Enuff Logo Model or how about a pair of men's inline skates?

Skates.co.uk also have a great range of scooters, skates and Heelys.  There's free UK next day delivery for orders over £40 and a Price Match Promise to boot (or skate).

If you would like to win your dad this scooter, simply enter via the Rafflecopter below.  The giveaway ends at 11:59 pm on Sunday 11th June. UK entrants only. Terms and conditions can be viewed on my competitions page.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Good luck!

Listed On Loquax, Superlucky.me and www.theprizefinder.com.

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How To Take Control Of Your Family Finances

Your family’s financial health should be one of your top priorities. Whether you have one child or five children, raising them all the way up to age 21 can be expensive. If you want to ensure that you have healthy finances for the future, here's what you need to do.

Put Money Into Savings And Forget About It 

If you don't have money in a savings account, you’re effectively living paycheck to paycheck. You should be putting money into a savings account and forgetting about it, ready for a rainy day.

Choosing a savings account with a good interest rate is best. You can also decide to invest money in things like stocks, property, and shares, but you need to be prepared to wait for your returns.

Find Ways To Bring In More Money 

How can you bring in more money? There are so many ways you can bring in money using the internet. However, you can also rent out your driveway, sell things you no longer need, and do other things offline to ensure you’re topping up your earnings.

Create A Budget And Stick To It 

Being wealthy is not only about how much money you bring in, but how much of it you can keep. Make sure you create a family budget and stick to it. This budget may need to change depending on different circumstances, but you should have a good knowledge of your numbers to begin.

The following infographic can give you more helpful tips on what to do!


credit to family budget

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Mindfulness for Kids with the Mindful Monsters

It's Mental Health Awareness Week and what better time to teach your kids the benefits of Mindfulness whilst supporting disability charity Scope at the same time?

Scope's mission is to make this country a place where disabled people have the same opportunities as everyone else. They provide support, information and advice to more than a quarter of a million disabled people and their families every year, whilst raising awareness of the barriers facing disabled people and helping them build resilience in their day-to-day lives.

They have developed Mindful Monsters, a set of activity cards, which gives parents a new and exciting way to help their little ones develop important life skills through exploring mindfulness, while spending quality time together. The cards are quick and easy activities parents and children can do anywhere.

Research shows mindfulness in families has many benefits:

· More resilience in day-to-day life
· Improved focus
· Better understanding of their emotions
· A sense of calm
· More positive thinking – promoting kindness and gratitude

The cards are brilliant to have on hand to whip out when a tantrum threatens (adult or child!) to help take a moment and change focus - to get everybody back on track without an emotional maelstrom!

As parents and carers know, children often struggle to understand their emotions - which affects both their behaviour and that of the adults around them.  Mindful Monsters are a great way of calming everybody down.

It's a far healthier approach, too, than resorting to sugary snacks and other forms of food related bribery.

There are 4 Mindful Monsters who each offer a slightly different type of activity.

There is Thinky, who helps kids with their concentration, Giggles, who likes to promote kindness and gratitude, Snug who teaches relaxation and destressing and Sparky who likes to get creative without leaving glitter bombs or mess.

Each monster offers a range of activities in their particular area - so Snug may ask you to concentrate on your breath by seeing if you can breathe like a snake, or a whale (tricky that one).  Giggles might ask you to pay someone a compliment and see how good that makes you feel.  Thinky suggests going for a walk to somewhere you know well and spotting three new things, whilst Sparky might get you to pull your scariest monster face opposite someone else without laughing.

Each activity is well thought out and fun and would work with any age.  The Husband reports that pulling monster faces was the ice breaker activity at a recent conference.  (Who says IT people don't have a sense of fun .....).

Caitlin (9) and Ieuan (8) both thought the cards were fun although I think it helps to have had a conversation about mindfulness with your kids first - and if you can embrace it as a family so much the better.  Otherwise it's a little 'left field' to ask a grumpy 8 year old to stand on one leg when you've just upset him (again) by restricting his access to Roblox.

To get the cards, you need to sign up and donate just £7.50 monthly (postage is included).  Then you'll receive your starter pack for the first month, and then extra cards and a newsletter each month following that with more activities from the Mindful Monsters.

The welcome pack (which fits easily through your letterbox) contains an introductory booklet, some fun stickers and your first 7 monster cards. There are 84 cards to collect in total.

The cards are of a decent thickness to withstand lots of use and feature the appropriate monster on the front together with a reminder of the particular focus - e.g. creativity.

You can make the most of your donation by gift-aiding it to allow Scope to claim another 25% from the Government and 70p in the pound goes towards supporting disabled people and their families.

I think this is a really creative scheme which gives a little extra to donors and builds a long term relationship with them.

So do your bit and seek out a little extra calm with the Mindful Monsters.

Find out more at www.mindfulmonsters.co.uk or www.scope.org.uk where you'll find other ways to donate and support this great charity.

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OCD - My Glasses & Me

It's Mental Health Awareness Week and I can think of no better time to share one of the aspects of my life that I have had to learn to cope with.

Don't Touch My Glasses!

It is very easy to think of mental illness as being "something that happens to other people" but, in the same way that the health of our bodies fluctuates and changes during the course of our everyday life, so, too, I believe does the health of our minds.

This, in itself, is the very reason why mental illness should not be stigmatised and the reason why we should discuss it.  For example, most people suffer from anxiety of sorts.  It's just that it is on a spectrum, rising and falling along with the events of our daily life.

My own problem falls within, I believe, the area of an obsessive compulsive disorder.  I cannot bear people touching my glasses.  I know exactly what triggered this obsession.  A very unpleasant break-up, combined with a miserable job situation led me to focus on making everything all right by having the nose pads of my glasses 'just so'.  The fact that I can logically assess what started it, however, is no help whatsoever in dealing with it.

I went from compulsively checking the fit of my glasses to putting them on the tops of wardrobes in hotel rooms so that housekeeping staff would not accidentally touch them, thereby altering the fit.  If relatives were visiting, I would make sure I had contact lenses in so that there was no chance of my glasses being knocked when they hugged and kissed me hello.  If I went anywhere in a car, the glasses would have to travel in their special case in the glove pocket and the case had to be carried quite separately from my luggage so that they would not be knocked about in transit.

Today I have 4 or 5 pairs of glasses which sit on top of a chest of drawers, not in their cases because I cannot bear to fold the arms in case it alters the fit of the glasses.  I rotate the various pairs throughout the day.  I'm a lot better than I used to be.  Having kids has helped me enormously. You can't be cross with a child who knocks your glasses when giving you a loving hug and kiss, can you? But the first few times it happened I used to feel shaky and even a bit sick.

The husband is resigned to this and is understanding - up to a point.  My obsessions also extend to quite a bit of health related anxiety, extending to my teeth, jaw, back and any other bit which doesn't seem to be functioning quite right!

I tell you this because I want you to understand that it is OK to be like this.  This is what happens to humans when they are under stress and need loving understanding.

Something interesting happened, however, when I asked my blogging friends to share the strange rituals and habits that they live with on a daily basis - so that I could share them with you and help you to feel better if you are like me.

Some reacted with quite a lot of anger.  They objected to my using the word "quirk" to describe these behaviours.  They wanted to make quite sure I was not going to encourage the use of the term OCD as an adjective (for example saying "oh that's so OCD" to describe somebody fussing) because it is unfair and disrespectful to those suffering from conditions like this.

Fair point, however, we have to talk about mental illness so we can understand mental health.  We have to hold these conditions up to the clear light of day to educate and inform and to teach our family and friends to help us make our lives as rich and fruitful as possible.  Make no mistake,  they suffer along with us and they need coping strategies too.

And if we don't talk about things like OCD, how will we ever find the right words, the kind words to help people to deal with it?  Nobody would expect a cancer sufferer to keep their feelings to themselves and not discuss their illness, would they?  Our hospitals are not full of people stoically keeping their symptoms to themselves. Talking can be part of the cure - for the sufferer and their family.

What was incredibly reassuring to me was the number of bloggers who were kind enough to share their behaviours and I list some of them below so that you can see just how common it is to deal with anxiety by adopting certain rituals.

Gemma:  "I have to walk on the left side of people otherwise I feel very uncomfortable, it's even caused me to have panic attacks in the past."

Jadine:  "I cant leave the house without checking the door is closed/locked twice and the lights of off going round the place twice."  [www.thepunkrockprincess.com]

Gillian:  "I can't have people touch the insides of my tomatoes. Like in restaurants etc. Whole tomatoes are fine but if they touch the seeds,even with their gloves, I can't eat it."

Jade:  "Everything has to be in its place and I know if someone has moved something also on days out I have to plan it right down to times I have anxiety attacks if we are not in the schedule that I have it drives me mad that I'm like this but I can't change it."

Sarah Louise:   "My partner has bad OCD. He has to make sure every door, window etc is shut before we go out and he will stare at it talking to himself before he moves on to the next door or window. He takes absolutely ages to lock up but won't let anyone else do it. He will physically hurt his hands and fingers locking a door as he said he has to 'feel it locked when it can't turn anymore' until he can rest. He will stand turning a key in the door for ages and if you talk to him while he's locking up he has to do it all over again.

I have a lot of things. Dont like odd numbers... Won't let anyone else change my daughters nappy... It has to be a certain way right in the middle ( The fasten part from the side...its hard to explain). Matching socks. Things have to be central else I can't rest. My daughters cot canopy has to have no creases or bumps in it.... Clothes are to be hung on the line a certain way and folded a certain way. Whoo, could go on forever."

Natasha:  "Mad 5 pieces of loo roll for me, wash hands 3 times. But it's mostly 5 times on most things."

Elyse:  "I have to use the same numbers. Like my alarm is set for 08:08. If you head to my blog and blog page Sweet Elyse Blog I have to schedule them in for 13:13, 16:16 or 14:14 (at a push) and I can't attend appointments unless I have at least 7 days notice. That's just the start, I can live with these things and my friends and family have got used to my ''quirks''."

Charlotte:  "this is so random but I can't sleep in a room without opening and checking every cupboard and wardrobe twice, I have no idea what I am checking for but if I haven't opened, checked and closed the doors twice I just lie awake until I finally do! (www.everinmay.com)."

Charlie:  "I have lots. I eat a slice of bread from the bottom (the base of the loaf ) to the top. I can't bear uneven numbers when doing a workout, if something isn't balanced, I'll do more. I can't bear marks on a table in a restaurant, or crumbs if I've made the mess and will tidy it up. I always put shoes and socks etc on right foot first. Same if I'm shaving my legs"  "

Nikki:  "I eat all my food separately so if I have chicken peas and potatoes on my plate I eat the peas first then the chicken and finally the potatoes. I won't put ketchup on my plate until the food I need it for is about to be eaten."

Leslie:  "My thing is straight lines. Two objects next to each other must be parallel or I am not happy. Posters or photo frames on the wall must be straight or I will move them - regardless of where I am. All of my furniture has to be parallel with my living room rug for me to be able to relax (or at a 45 degree diagonal). I also have to wash my hands hundreds of times a day after touching things. Even if I have just washed them. Oh and I absolutely refuse to touch public toilet door handles... I've been known to wait by the door for 20 minutes or more for someone to open it for me when they come in."

Tina:  "I have to bleach my toilet three times a day, my rug has to line up with the sofa and the fire.".

As you can see, there are a myriad of ways in which our stress and anxiety can express itself through odd behaviours.  Nobody could deny the misery of suffering from OCD at a level where it is interfering with everyday life but equally, I think it helps to acknowledge those of us at the lower end of the spectrum may be suffering too.

I think I have just about got my 'glasses thing' under control but I know I'm stressed because I start to slip into my old ways - checking that the nose pads sit equally on my nose, for example.  Even my optician is used to my "glasses thing" and he tells me that he has other clients whose anxiety manifests itself in the fit of their glasses too!

So what exactly is Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)?  Much helpful information can be found on the website of OCD-UK and on the NHS's own website.

Current estimates for the UK population are that there are potentially around 741,504 people living with OCD at any one time. A disproportionately high number, 50% of all these cases, will fall into the severe category, with less than a quarter being classed as mild cases.

OCD presents itself in many guises. It is not just hand washing or checking light switches. OCD sufferers may experience obsessions "which take the form of persistent and uncontrollable thoughts, images, impulses, worries, fears or doubts.

These thoughts are often intrusive, unwanted, disturbing, significantly interfere with the ability to function on a day-to-day basis as they are incredibly difficult to ignore. People with OCD often realise that their obsessional thoughts are irrational, but they believe the only way to relieve the anxiety caused by them is to perform compulsive behaviours, often to prevent perceived harm happening to themselves or, more often than not, to a loved one.

Compulsions are repetitive physical behaviours and actions or mental thought rituals that are performed over and over again in an attempt to relieve the anxiety caused by the obsessional thoughts. Avoidance of places or situations to prevent triggering these obsessive thoughts is also considered to be a compulsion. But unfortunately, any relief that the compulsive behaviours provide is only temporary and short lived, and often reinforces the original obsession, creating a gradual worsening cycle of the OCD." [source:  OCD-UK].

If you are suspect you are suffering from OCD or any other mental health related issue, please talk to your GP or visit the charity OCD-UK who have plenty of information about OCD and related disorders. Alternatively, there is the website of The Mental Health Foundation who are the organisers of Mental Health Awareness Week at www.mentalhealth.org.uk. For this year's campaign rather than asking why so many people are living with mental health problems, the goal is to seek to uncover why too few of us are thriving with good mental health.

If all this feels like too much, a starting point may be an honest chat with a trusted friend or family member.

And it doesn't matter which words you use to describe your anxieties.  Actions always speak louder than words, I find and being kind to yourself by seeking help is the first crucial step.

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Thumb Chucks - The New Fidget Toy On The Block

Fidget toys are everywhere and whilst my two love their Fidget Spinners, they have discovered an equally fun alternative - Thumb Chucks. 

Fidget toys were apparently first designed for children with autism to help them develop fine motor skills. Recently kids (and grown ups) have been starting to use them with claims being made that they promote focus and concentration, thereby reducing stress. Those of us who worked in offices in the 80's will remember the appearance of stress balls which were less interactive but arguably achieved the same thing.

Thumb Chucks, however, are a little different from Fidget Spinners.  For a start they light up and they are tipped to be the new yo yo with a number of different techniques and tricks you can learn. 

They are easy to carry and Zing Toys, who make these, suggest they are suitable for "festivals, going out, killing time on the tube, hanging out, waiting for friends and challenging your mates to the latest tricks"  You can certainly do more with them than just watch them spin.

Thumb Chucks – Control the Roll!

Whilst the tricks are easy to learn though, they are quite challenging to master. When you have mastered each trick you can uploading your videos online to unlock new coloured, interchangeable belts that players can use to flaunt their skill status. Players upload and showcase tricks with special effects on social media with the Thumb Chucks App and watch new trick tutorials by the Thumb Chucks guru online.

Whilst Caitlin and Ieuan don't have too much patience for complicated tricks,  they did like Thumb Chucks.  Here's their take on both Thumb Chucks and Fidget Spinners.




Available from toy shops, retailers and online from Spring 2017 for £7.99 RRP. Recommended for ages 5 to 99+.

*PR samples were received for the purpose of this post

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